Hey, let’s talk about weddings and erectile dysfunction today. Firstly, weddings can get really luxurious in Singapore, one friend had a wedding in Bali and they paid the government to shoot some chemical in the clouds so that it wouldn’t rain for their outdoor wedding. They actually paid to change the environment for one day.
So I was in Singapore over the weekend for a wedding and it was one of the best time that I’ve ever had. Firstly, it was a really good friend getting married. And I’ve known him before and after he got into his relationship, and he was a great man before and now has become an even better man. Secondly, it was at Capella, that’s the 6-star hotel on the Sentosa island that just hosted the god, Kim Jong-Un, and President Trump, in their Singapore Summit. This is probably the best hotel that you can have a wedding at in Singapore, and it was just so well thought out. Lavish like you would expect, no flooding, like in the Crazy Rich Asians movie, but just as lush.
I’m so happy whenever I see a friend get married. Although I don’t see myself getting married anytime soon, I still love that moment when the bride and the bride’s dad walk down the aisle and at the end of their walk, the dad gives his daughter’s hand to the groom. I first saw this at my own brother’s wedding about 7 years ago in New York, now before, I had never wanted to ever get married, I just didn’t see it as being necessary to confirm the love of two people, I saw it more as a legal document. I guess a lot of my friends are starting to tell me they don’t want to get married, or I could just be living past that stage when everyone is getting married, now that I’m 29. When I saw my sister in-law’s dad hand her hand over to my brother’s hand it really changed my whole view of marriage. That acceptance of the responsibility to take care of one person for your whole life, and to be able to give them so much of yourself, and to enjoy the rest of your life together, suddenly made sense to me. And I saw that again last weekend at that wedding. It gets me every time.
Here’s the other unusual thing about Asian weddings, usually what you bring to the wedding as a present is an amount of money, a symbol of appreciation, in a red envelope. Some of you might know about this but for a guy who maybe goes to only a handful of weddings, I have no idea how much to put in the envelope. If you’re listening to this and you’re a dweeb like me, apparently there are a couple of websites that give you an exact amount that you should give based on the hotel that the wedding is that. Wish I’d known that earlier. I thought, this would be a great time if I had a girlfriend, I’m sure a girlfriend would be able to know about this stuff.
So packets can range from $30 for your backyard, down-to-earth, simple catered humble celebration to up to $150 per person for the upmarket hotels. And if you’re a foreigner trying to find a red packet, you can find them at $2 shops, thrifty shops, or any place that sells Chinese cultural items. So, getting down to the actual amount of cash to give, do avoid unlucky amounts containing the number ‘4’ as the word ‘four’ in Mandarin and Cantonese is similar phonetically to the Chinese word for ‘die’ or ‘death’, which would be the worst thing to say to a couple, “congratulations, now die”.
I love Asian weddings, here’s why, the food. You’ll get like 8 courses and you get to try every single protein, and it’s probably prepared classic Asian style, like peking duck, suckling pig, Eh Fu noodles, or steak, although I don’t think Chinese cuisine does beef very well, except for in stir frys.
So there’s this thing in Singapore weddings called the lucky draw. Which is kind of like a bingo, if you imagine Bingo in the west, except it’s part of the wedding ceremony. Everyone gets a ticket and people win prizes if there number gets called. I always thought it was such a great novelty tradition to get people to stay until the end of the night, when they’re usually held. It’s kind of like role call, if you don’t have your number, you can’t win a prize.
Earlier that day, I was in the pool checking Reddit, and my iPhone dropped into the pool. It’s a 6S so it’s not waterproof but I took it out almost immediately and dried it with towels, but I could see water starting to mess up the screen. You know when it starts to fog up. Fast forward to the wedding, and it’s the lucky draw, that time of the night, and for some reason, our table has been allocated the major prize, which was the new iPhone XR. Out of like 500 people there, I somehow got called up to win the iPhone, I felt so lucky, obviously still feeling like an unco for dropping the phone in the first place. Think about it, how amazing would it be at weddings if you could walk away with a prize? They should do it at family gatherings as well, it would really give you a reason to actually participate.
We also did this Yam Seng, wedding tradition, where basically everyone yells a phrase in our Cantonese, which means “drink to success”, at the top of their lungs for as long as they can, and then cheers.
Also, I love it when you run into someone at a wedding that you haven’t seen for years. This was a majority Asian wedding but one of the token white guys was one of my really good friends from high school. He had flown in to be at the wedding. He was one of the cheekiest guys I ever knew at high school so I knew that the wedding was just going to become that much more fun for me. It’s so great when you can catch up with someone that you grew up with, especially if you’ve moved places from where you went to school.
Anyway, there’s something about the people that you meet at a wedding that makes it so much more fun, you’re not meeting them through a work or a professional event, they’re just there to enjoy this beautiful romantic moment between two people, and it’s etched in my memory forever, or until the time that the 3rd gin and tonic hit me. Take a moment to think back to the last wedding you went to. That was a special night for me.
I got along well with so many people there that I hope to see them again. And one guy even wrote to me after about this podcast, so hopefully, we can work on something together.
I haven’t mentioned any names here but I obviously wish the bride and groom an eternity of love and that they grow happily together, ever after. If you’re listening to this, I hope you have found a loved one, or am bonding with someone that you want to grow something with. But if you’re like me and single, I’ll see you on Tinder.
Hey thanks for listening to today’s episode, I was just kind of caught gushing about weddings, and I know that this isn’t really in the shows prerogative to talk about non business stuff, but I thought I’d open up a bit and talk about cultured things, hope you enjoyed this.
Music (Royalty Free/ CC)
Blue Ducks – Four Floss Five Six
Lee Rosevere- Up All Night
Lee Rosevere- Cosmic Tingles piano version
Lee Rosevere – Eyes Do More Than See
Podington Bear -Dreamliner